The 2009 NFL Draft in Bizarro


Published: April 22, 2009


... process.  While it is interesting to research the value of each player and then try to match it with the needs of each team, I thought it would feel less bureaucratic if someone can just have some fun with the whole process.  That is the goal here.

That being said: Ladies and Gentlemen, I present you with the Bizarro 2009 NFL Mock Draft (for Round 1):

Detroit Lions:
The Lions shock the world by drafting Brian Orakpo No.1.  Orakpo signs right before the draft and commits to a contract with $35 million in guaranteed money.

St. Louis:
St. Louis passes on Michael Crabtree (who is currently injured) and they draft Aaron Curry

Kansas City Chiefs:
The Chiefs, after being unable to negotiate a trade with the Lions, draft the next best End they could get, B.J. Raji - who immediately becomes the "Next Warren Sapp"

Seattle Seahawks:
Draft Matthew Stafford, tri...

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