BREAKING NEWS! Brandon Marshall Wants to Not Play for YOU!

By
for NFLSportChannel.com

Published: June 16, 2009

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... issued a statement to NFL teams that he desperately wants to not play for someone other than the Denver Broncos.

In his statement, Marshall announced that he is offering an astonishing 100 percent no-money-back guarantee and a solemn oath to embarrass the bejeezes out of any team who is looking for a talented wide receiver who will play at least five games per season. 

Here is an excerpt from his statement: 

"I just want you all to know [stumbles, hurts old person], that I will do whatever I can [pauses, teeters] to help your team [vomits, checks pocket for car keys], but I do have other responsibilities."  Marshall failed to elaborate on what those responsibilities might be. 

A reporter familiar with the star wideout speculated that Marshall either meant helping needy children at the Darrent Williams Teen Center or helping children off a rapidly spinning merry-go-round with a motorized vehicle of his choosing...

Read Complete Article at Bleacher Report - NFL
Article Source: BleacherReport.com


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